oldschool CxC

Thursday, July 31, 2003

So, another web site (which shall remain nameless) called this the worst headline ever. But I kind of like it. So I figgered I'd share and let you all decide

SL: I vote "yes", worst headline Evvvvvveeerrrr!

E: Just don't mess with my girl Dahlia. Her brainy, sarcastic wit gets my corpus delicti all amicus curiae.

E: Since this post is Laker-related: I updated my NBA Live game to reflect the current rosters (sans rookies), then sim'd an entire season. The results were the Lakers going 79-3 in the regular season and 15-1 in the playoffs. The T-Wolves were the #2 seed in the west, and the Lakers big four each averaged over 20 points per game. I expect nothing less from the upcoming season.

SL: You should run that sim w/out Kobe in the Lineup and see what results you get.

"Allowing children to be adopted by persons living in such (homosexual) unions would actually mean doing violence to these children ... (placing) them in an environment that is not conducive to their full human development."

The Catholic Church weighing in on gay marriage and adoption. Unbelievable. Someone should nudge the Pope awake and say, "Hey mack, why not get your own glass house in order before throwing stones." At best this seems a horrific PR blunder to comment on child welfare while their sex scandal is still unravelling. I can see their marketing guy whispering in the background, "Ixnay on the idskay."
So what's the alternative environment that is conducive to kids' full human development, cooling their heels in a state-run institution rather than being adopted by people who want to love and care for them? Hmm. Why not put the over 3/4 million children (figure from US Dept of Health & Human Services) awaiting adoption in the care of priests.

RM: I wish I could get a larger version of this magazine cover:



I think the cover art pretty much lets you know where they come out on the issue. I even made the mistake of checking out one the articles therein. A note to the author, Mr. Kurtz, should he read this blog: If your best argument is "slippery slope" you got nothing. I can only assume that companion articles will take up the always compelling "against nature" argument. [E: Frankly I don't see anything wrong with the slippery slope argument in this case, because it does ring true to me that allowing gay marriage on privacy grounds will open the door for legalized polygamy/polyamory. The difference between Kurtz and me is that I am completely comfortable with this outcome. As far as I'm concerned, you can marry and/or fuck as many humans of legal age as your heart desires. Go nuts. But I draw the line at pumpkins and sheep.] {RM: "Open the door" is just another way of saying "slippery slope", innit?. Rick sez that it's a rhetorical device to make something sound conditionally connected when the speaker can't or won't demonstrate that proposition to actually be true. A more rhetorically savvy author might try to imply a slippery slope argument without pointing out the nature of the argument. But this bufoon states at the outset that he intends to make a slippery slope argument, demonstrating conclusively that he's got nothing.}

On a related note I make this legal query: Will the Supremes find it within the Feds' commerce clause authority to pass legislation banning gay marriage? I haven't curled up with the Constitution in a while, but I don't think that the regulation of marriage is an enumerated power. 5 current Supremes struck down the federal gun 'n' schools legislation in Lopez, and Thomas even mentioned federal regulation of marriage in a "slippery slope" argument in his concurrence. Any guesses? I for one posit that there is no constitutional basis for such a federal law. Or maybe W is planning to take away a state's federal highway funds if they allow gay marriage.

[E: Yeah, their Hershey Highway funds. Ha ha ha ha ha! Ok, sorry. That's two gay-joke posts in less than 5 minutes. Time for me to go back to PC camp.]

SL: Flye, recite these 10 times a day and you will be cured . E's medicine

Tuesday, July 29, 2003

An Onion article that's actually funny and mentions CxC.

Monday, July 28, 2003

Bob Hope dead at 100. Have to give props where props are due. RIP to a funny muffugger.

[E: I read this Bob Hope joke in one article that used it as an example that he was losing touch with the public as he got older... maybe it's just me, but I thought it was damn funny:

Did you hear the Statue of Liberty has AIDS? I don't know if she got it from the mouth of the Hudson or the Staten Island ferry.

{RM sez: Both statements are true. It is funny. But it's also completely rude and guarantizzied to offend a hizzle of a lot o' people (which is what makes it so funny, IMO).}

SL: plus i would say this is MORE in tune with today's brash comedy. i guess its only offensive if a hundred year old white man says it.

A: I caught a moment of an interview with Bob H. on Larry Kings show, where LK asked Bob what he thought/whether he liked the new style of raunchy, say anything comedy. Bob said he these folks were making a living and nothing was wrong with that, that he could tell a raunchy one or two himself 'in the locker room', but had to refrain from the most part because of his wide (tv, radio) appeal.

Monday, July 21, 2003


some dudes sketchbook in a cool site.


[RM: Law enforcement folks need to keep an eye on this lunatic]

SL: We lost Mad Dog, but managed to get Horace Grant back. What a weird monday.


"[Defense attorneys are] looking for a way to demonstrate that this woman is hysterical and over-reactive," Pugsley said. "This is literally dynamite evidence, a bonanza for the defense and a landmine for prosecution."

Bryant's attorneys could not be reached for comment Saturday by the Register.

---


Madsen: You're my jail bitch

---

SH: they took your pic down, but here's more

Katelyn Kristine Faber, 19 years old

check the lower right photo and caption. related?

and on a side note, i made a kobe poster for kicks. view the poster here

Friday, July 18, 2003



the 3 main characters for the toon in the works.

[E: Dig the Charlie Brown sweater vest!]

Thursday, July 17, 2003



just got done watching the press conferance with malone and payton. malone said he not going to wear #32 after all. they also looked really excited to be here, with malone talking about making a statement from pre-season. i can't wait until we see this happen. funniest thing is Mitch Kupcheck still looks like he's wearing the face of disbelief for basically pulling off the best offseason by any GM in NBA history. Hell, maybe in any sport.

SHEasy Tiger, Jerry West 1996: Traded Vlade for a draft pick (Kobe Bryant) and signed Shaquille O'neal.

SL: but he didn't do it for about $6 million total. and he hasn't traded for any rapists either :o (j/king) although we don't know what goes on with malone in the back woods, or with payton in the back of the oakland (land of pimpin') strip clubs.

RM: Would that there were Oakland strip clubs, but alas there are none save perhaps a few underground venues.

Tuesday, July 15, 2003

Some of you guys will recognize the lawyer in this article, the guy in the picture facing the cop. Busted a cop who hit a VIP room wither for tactical reasons or for a Zuffle. You might say that he's the club's Bully Back

RM: OK, I admit I gave this no more than a quick skim earlier, but now I am compelled by honor to say "good post" and "good work Tony." Hard to say if he was on the right side of the law, but he was definitely on the right side of right, if'n you know what I mean. I especially like the quote, "'My client is not a prostitute,'" the defense attorney angrily proclaimed." I mean, my life won't be complete until I'm quoted as "angrily proclaiming" something. Damn fine work, Tony. Makes me proud to be a Hastings alum.

Tuesday, July 08, 2003

Sometimes the letters can be the most entertaining part of the newspaper,

A: they changed.. I was reading some crazy pimpy post and now its some looneys saying the devil weed isn't so bad. What letters did you have in mind when you posted?

RM: The crazy pimpy post is what I had in mind. It is now available here.

Barney is harder than those break-dancing mascots.
(profanity alert on the audio in there)
Oh yeah, and here's a story about a Vietnamese poker dude.
sl: men and men's men are the men



Which brings us to:

Noah Cross: Exactly what do you know about me? Sit down.

Jake Gittes: Mainly that you're rich, and too respectable to want your name in the newspapers.

Noah Cross: Of course I'm respectable. I'm old. Politicians, ugly buildings, and whores all get respectable if they last long enough.

Extra special bonus points if'n you can name that movie.

sl: Chinatown? [Ay, for reals]

Monday, July 07, 2003

Kobe, Kobe, Kobe. I hope this is just a ploy to promote a thuggier image. Or maybe they were playing nerf hoop and he teabagged her.

EK: Hmmm...looking at that first Kobe article makes me wonder...how do I really get in touch with HotBabe67? ;)

sl: [ gary, what size ring do you need?

and in other NBA news, i thought this was a great take on stoudamire's latest "weed" issues:

Matt (Portland, OR): Ken, any comments on Stoudamire's monumental stupidity?

Ken Bikoff: (6:02 PM ET ) It is just stunning. Who goes through a metal detector with his weed wrapped in aluminum foil? That's a new low for ignorance. Just the fact that he had weed was bad enough, let alone try to take it on a plane post 9-11. Ridiculous.


and also

blazer's to make major cuts ... this is really all based on one fourth quarter breakdown when portland took their foot off the laker's throat in 2000 and choked on the world's largest chicken bone. blazer's win that one and they waltz to get their rings. ]

sl again: thought it was interesting kidd is staying in NJ, and Zoe deciding to go to NJ too. I guess even stacking the Spurs with more talent just doesn't seem good enough anymore after the Laker's incredible summer. If Zoe is healthy the whole season the Nets get back to the finals with ease. Unfortunately they meet Dream Team III.

Friday, July 04, 2003

The responses you have provided indicate that your symptoms may be consistent with Adult ADHD. Huh? What was the question? Who's doing what now?

sl: i think i'm going to make an appointment right no...ohhh look at the pretty butterfly.

A: So one rarely and the rest sometimes gives that answer. Oh, thanks Eli-Lilly.. where do I go to pick up my pills now?

Wednesday, July 02, 2003

what the duck? . this is what happens without the proper medication taken by samuel lemons. give him drugs now!

[E: The responses you have provided indicate that...]

sl: btw, not sure if any of you play around with photoshop but i'm organizing the notes from class in a photoshop blog.